Call to Ban Fat Santas in South Australia

I am a nice fat Santa
In our local store
Employed I’ve been for many years
And hope for many more

Horror/shock they’re calling on
Fat Santa me to ban
Say you not good model Jack
You junk food from a can

They say I pro-mote over
Indulgence at this time
Not a real good message Jack
(But fits in with my rhyme)

We like our Santa rotund
We like him rotund/fat
We like a round and jolly man
On lap where we can sat


My daddy is only eating one turkey this Christmas……..


My daddy is only having two beers
Last Christmas he got drunk and was sick everywhere
Aunty Ethel was not impressed……


We’re having presents wrapped in newspaper. What fun!
Mummy says Christmas wrapping paper is such a waste……


Daddy says we don’t have to over-indulge to have
fun at Christmas……


Professional Santa helper Peter Hogg:
“A skinny Santa would look ridiculous,
lose all appeal and parents would
not spend money to get a photo”



Don Matthews
December 2022